Toxic Younger Sister

[2L8]

When it comes to an update on the whole situation I'm doing very well in school I earned some scholarships , passed CLEPS and the campus is pretty nice. I also found a really good job where I learn the ropes in holistic healthcare. I met with the counselor and he advised me to see someone about my health ( I have a collapsed stomach from all the stress.)
 But when it comes to my sister she's still childish. After that accident I don't go anywhere with her anymore , but I noticed she mirrors everything I do and tries to mock  everything I do.

[davewill]

Great news! Your sister may grow up some day or may stay childish. Either way, you have to live your life. Glad to see you are making progress and doing things you like.

[Lindagerr]

PLEASE DO NOT let your sister ever make you feel like your life is useless or unbearable. My daughter was verbally abused by her husband and attempted suicide twice. As a mother I can't tell you how much that scared and hurt me. Even if your parents don't treat you right or understand you now, and they have a poor way of showing you verbally, I am sure they do Love you and want you in their life.

I am now an OLD lady compared to you, but believe me I have gone through many hard times when I was younger. There were so many times I wanted to end my life and once I even made a (Weak) attempt at it. What I am trying to say is things change, things always change. What seems like an unlivable situation now will change and something else will become more important.

My sons are 10 and 12 years older then you, when they were your age they practically hated each other and neither one could talk civilly to the other. Now they both live with us and actually (kind of) get along. They are not best friends, but they do some things together hang out once in a while and go out to eat. So there is hope that once your sister matures your relationship will get better. Know that your parents are probably just doing the best they can do with the information they have and the many other things they are handling.

I will also tell you even when my sons were at their worst with each other they would be the first to come to the defense of their brother if someone else put one down and he wasn't there.

Please continue to see a mental health professional, it sounds like you could use a lot of self esteem repair, if you even consider offing yourself and your father can call you such disgusting names, you need someone to help you see how worthy you are. I can see that just reading what you have written here.

Please do keep us up on how you are doing and the great progress you are making towards your degree.

[High_Order1]

Hey!

One of the reasons I check in here, is hoping to hear something positive in your situation. If no one else tells you, for what it's worth, I AM VERY PROUD OF YOU for sticking with it, getting your goals set, and following your path, regardless of your family (and, other) situations.

Really sorry to hear about your stomach issues; prayerfully with time and some medical intervention those too will be just a bad memory.

I hope you'll keep at it - look how far you've come in such a short time!!

[CedricChad]

Doing childish things in 15 years age is really strange as one can expect this from a 3/4 years kid. I will suggest you to ignore her activities as much as you can. I am sure it will work.

[2L8]

Doing childish things in 15 years age is really strange as one can expect this from a 3/4 years kid. I will suggest you to ignore her activities as much as you can. I am sure it will work.

  2 days ago she literally but a vacumn cleaner on during a sound sensitive lab and I was so mad. She didn't expect to get caught but when she did she's literally ignoring everyone in the house. Part of me wants to apologize but the other half doesn't.

[jsd]

Why would YOU be apologizing? Don't reward/reinforce her behavior. Ignore it and move on.

[dfrecore]

Why would YOU be apologizing? Don't reward/reinforce her behavior. Ignore it and move on.

I agree.  There's no reason you should apologize.  Sounds like you need to spend less time at home.  Find a nice quiet library to do some studying.  Or really ANYWHERE but home.

When I was in high school, my brother's friend had a troubled situation at home.  He spent just about every weekend, from Friday after school to Sunday night, at our house.  Many weeknights as well.  He just basically went to his house to sleep, grab some clothes, and was there as little as possible.  I don't even think he ate there much. That's what I'd be doing in your situation.

[2L8]

I'm sorry to keep bothering you with this thread but it's just an exhausting situation.  
When it comes to the situation : It all started with her giving me mean looks , I ignored it and she started doing passive-aggressive tactics ( ex: silent treatment) and when my mother confronts her she denies it and cries. Recently , my mom told her she didn't want to here it.To be mad for a week is very stupid
, specifically when you started the whole fiasco. My mom knows that it's a "premeditated" attack .


 
Last Friday I tried to commit suicide , I just couldn't deal with it anymore. As stupid as it sounds I never got how you can never bother someone and keep to yourself but still run into trouble. My dad and mom say I put too much energy into this situation but I can't stand on living in a house where there is tension.  I can't get up because my stomach is in intense pain and I feel depressed. What can I do?

[leland.kirk]

I'm sorry to keep bothering you with this thread but it's just an exhausting situation.  
When it comes to the situation : It all started with her giving me mean looks , I ignored it and she started doing passive-aggressive tactics ( ex: silent treatment) and when my mother confronts her she denies it and cries. Recently , my mom told her she didn't want to here it.To be mad for a week is very stupid
, specifically when you started the whole fiasco. My mom knows that it's a "premeditated" attack .


 
Last Friday I tried to commit suicide , I just couldn't deal with it anymore. As stupid as it sounds I never got how you can never bother someone and keep to yourself but still run into trouble. My dad and mom say I put too much energy into this situation but I can't stand on living in a house where there is tension.  I can't get up because my stomach is in intense pain and I feel depressed. What can I do?

Suicide is a very serious thing to consider. I'll definitely reiterate that a healthcare professional/therapist or counselor of some kind would be ideal. Human beings live longer lives than we realize, and there's so much beauty in the world one could miss out on. Situations change, and I can only hope that you wait it out long enough to see a better one. Your life matters. I know this has basically been said, but it's absolutely worth keeping in mind.

Regarding the stomach pain: do you know what exactly it is? I used to get stomach ulcers from stress/anxiety, and I can relate to depression keeping you from getting out of bed.

Regarding all of the above, the best thing for me was always meditation. It doesn't click with everyone, but it's absolutely worth the effort. Find a quiet, private spot if possible, and just take as long as you need to just focus on your breathing. A mantra could help, too. Starting out this could be anything. ('O bla di, o bla da, life goes on' or 'jah guru de va omm' if you happen to be a Beatles fan.) One that I've always liked was 'Sa ta na ma', which is Sanskrit for 'my true self' or something, but it's really the repetition of sounds that helps.
There's a cartoon called Steven Universe that happened to have an episode with a musical number on mindful meditation as a method of dealing with things like stress, anxiety and panic.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dHg50mdODFM
There's also an app called Insight Timer with guided meditation, bells and ambient sounds and such. It's like headspace in that it's aim is to teach you to meditate.
https://insighttimer.com
If something like a nearby Buddhist retreat or a yoga retreat happens to coincide with a break from school, it may be worth looking into. Not that I'm trying to push anything really

And the house/living situation. I'd definitely avoid it as much as possible. Showers at the gym are helpful.

I'm not always super competent about replying quickly (to anything) but you're more than welcome to PM me about anything