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+--- Thread: Need advice (/Thread-Need-advice--12223)
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Need advice - STG - 03-29-2011
There's this girl in my class who became friends with me in the beginning of the year...Long story short, last semester during finals week she asked me if I mind studying with her every day for the next day's test...I agreed to help her because I do better when I teach the material to someone else. But when it came to the day of the test she sat near me and cheated off my paper...If it would have been 1 question, I wouldn't mind (even though that's wrong too) but it was more than one question for every test we had (2 tests per day for a week). For some tests she didn't even bother studying because she figured she'd just cheat off my paper. Now I just started finals for this semester yesterday and she cheated off my paper again...it's not just 1 question, it's many parts of the test... So yesterday I told her I don't want her to cheat from me but she didn't listen...it middle of the test she grabbed my paper out of my hand and when I took it back, she told me she can't see my paper so that's why she took it. When I told her she's not meant to see my paper she gave me a look. Then by the second test, her friend came to sit in between me and that girl because she wanted to cheat off the girl who cheats from me...but I sat at the edge of the table and covered my paper and none of them saw it. When I handed in my paper, the other girl (not the one who cheated from me all the time) saw me taking out my notes from under my desk so that I can put it in my bag and leave. So when she saw me holding my notes she asked me to give it to her so she can check something up- so I told her no and I left. Later that day when I was having class this girl came up to me during the break and yelled at me for not giving her my notes during the test. She told me she didn't think I was such a person who wouldn't let someone cheat from me etc...
I'm about to go back into class now for another final and I don't know what to do...It's not like I wasn't helping her study. I gave her a copy of my notes last week and I study with her over the phone for every test, but she still cheats from me... And she sits near me right in front of the teacher and she's not scared to get caught...
Any advice?
Need advice - frankiebleyes - 03-29-2011
Go to the back of the class (anywhere away from her). You are being used big time. Do not study with her again and do not let her see your paper. At this point, telling is not an option and probably not something anyone would advise. Treat this as a learning experience and move on.
Need advice - Storyteller - 03-29-2011
I completely agree with FrankieB.
Need advice - cookderosa - 03-29-2011
It's time for Purpleteen to become Purpleadult. You're at a stage in your life where you choose the people you interact with. As children, we are not so lucky. But, as an adult, you have the control over allowing this nonsense or putting a stop to it TODAY. She sees weakness in you and is using that to her advantage, and YOU feel too weak to do anything about it. Don't feel bad, I'm a non-confrontational person too. I like to avoid conflict and give people the benefit of the doubt. But......
Worst case- teacher thinks you both were in this together and you get expelled from college with a permanent reference to cheating on your college transcript. How's that? Is it worth not hurting her feelings for that? It's time to gulp hard, and put this little girl in her place. Tell her directly and firmly in your most authoritative sounding voice that you really are done with this "relationship" and for her not to talk to you anymore, and if she looks at your paper again you're reporting her to the teacher and dean. Be ready, she's going to say bad things and pout. Boo-hoo, who cares!?!? Tell her, move to another seat, ignore her, and hope that she gets a clue. But, first glance, and you're marching to report her.
With 17 years of college teaching behind me, I promise you that in instances of cheating, I'm 100% in the camp of reporting both offenders.
Need advice - bricabrac - 03-29-2011
Wow, do you actually see yourself as innocent in this? You allowed your friend to copy your answers and seems would have continued to do so because you are still studying with/helping her. It seems you only became upset once the other (third) girl got involved. You are in as much trouble as your friend if anyone at your school ever found out. You both will face academic repercussions.
What was going on with the notes under the desk? Were you allowed open book or notes during the exam?That you discuss it as if you are the victim is even worse. Unbelievable.
Need advice - bawhitsett - 03-29-2011
Had a girl in class one time that routinely cheated off me. So on one test I answered almost every question incorrectly, let her copy the answers, and then turn her test in first. I then proceeded to change every answer to the correct answer in front of her. The look on her face was priceless. Needless to say, she never did it again.
Need advice - kimaya24 - 03-29-2011
bawhitsett Wrote:Had a girl in class one time that routinely cheated off me. So on one test I answered almost every question incorrectly, let her copy the answers, and then turn her test in first. I then proceeded to change every answer to the correct answer in front of her. The look on her face was priceless. Needless to say, she never did it again.
LMAO!! Now, that's a surefire way to stop a cheater!
Need advice - STG - 03-29-2011
bricabrac Wrote:What was going on with the notes under the desk? Were you allowed open book or notes during the exam?That you discuss it as if you are the victim is even worse. Unbelievable.No, it was under my chair during the exam because we needed our notes to be off the table. Once I handed in my test, I took them out from under my chair to put them in my bag and leave.
frankiebleyes Wrote:Go to the back of the class (anywhere away from her). You are being used big time. Do not study with her again and do not let her see your paper. At this point, telling is not an option and probably not something anyone would advise. Treat this as a learning experience and move on.Luckily today I came into class a few minutes late so the seat near her was taken so I sat away from her by my own table. Does anyone else agree not to study with her? I know what she's doing is totally wrong and I won't sit near her and I'll report her if it happens again...but why would studying with her do harm?
bawhitsett Wrote:Had a girl in class one time that routinely cheated off me. So on one test I answered almost every question incorrectly, let her copy the answers, and then turn her test in first. I then proceeded to change every answer to the correct answer in front of her. The look on her face was priceless. Needless to say, she never did it again.Wow hilarious you need guts to do that...
cookderosa Wrote:Worst case- teacher thinks you both were in this together and you get expelled from college with a permanent reference to cheating on your college transcript. How's that? Is it worth not hurting her feelings for that? It's time to gulp hard, and put this little girl in her place. Tell her directly and firmly in your most authoritative sounding voice that you really are done with this "relationship" and for her not to talk to you anymore, and if she looks at your paper again you're reporting her to the teacher and dean. Be ready, she's going to say bad things and pout. Boo-hoo, who cares!?!? Tell her, move to another seat, ignore her, and hope that she gets a clue. But, first glance, and you're marching to report her.Thanks...I think I sometimes need to be shaken up in order to realize things...I will take your advice.
Need advice - FinancialWorld - 03-29-2011
Ok my disclaimer!! I've never been in a classroom in my life.
With that aside, I would never allow someone to cheat off of my paper. If it happens once, then I'd report them. If I didn't report them, I'd make them pay me for "accidentally helping" them. Once I know about it, I'd make sure it never happens again.
My two cents and I'm sticking to it.
@purpleteen. It seems like you could get in trouble for not reporting her.
idk I don't have personal experience in this area.
Need advice - P00057870 - 03-29-2011
Sorry - new to this thread....but wondering if you were home schooled?
The reason for the question, is that many of us probably were exposed to this either during middle school or high school. There are always people who will look to take the easy way out, especially if they see someone who is friendly and open to them.
Growing a thick skin is a process we all go through and you can do this, too. :coolgleam: