Homeschool Question

[burbuja0512]

I have a question for those of you with some homeschool experience.

What do homeschool kids do for social activities? I'm a little stuck at helping DS with meeting more people. He recently dropped all of his old public school friends because he thinks he's maturing at a faster rate than they are. I'm so proud of DS to stay away from all the crap that his old friends are getting into, but now he's getting bored! He volunteers at the hospital, but we're looking for something else. We tried the only nearby homeschool group we could find with people near his age, but he really didn't click with the kids...

Suggestions welcome

[brothert69]

I have a question for those of you with some homeschool experience.

What do homeschool kids do for social activities? I'm a little stuck at helping DS with meeting more people. He recently dropped all of his old public school friends because he thinks he's maturing at a faster rate than they are. I'm so proud of DS to stay away from all the crap that his old friends are getting into, but now he's getting bored! He volunteers at the hospital, but we're looking for something else. We tried the only nearby homeschool group we could find with people near his age, but he really didn't click with the kids...

Suggestions welcome

church, pal sports, boy scouts, explorers, local clubs that are open to public?

[FinancialWorld]

In my area, we had homeschool choirs which where great for getting to know new people. Usually those friend ships let to other activities, such as, homeschool classes (taught by one of the parents). Try not to focus on the "socialization" but just keeping him active with people of all age groups. At 16 I joint an adult choir. Most of the people where twice my age, sometimes old enough to be my grandparents. It made me mature more, and I learned that some adults are just really old kids hilarious . Those that have friends must show themselves friendly. The rest will take care of its self.

[rebel100]

Civil Air Patrol might interest him, they do things like training for disaster and search and rescue in addition to the interest in flying.

Scouts

community sports teams soccer/football/baseball

Church

[LaterBloomer]

Civil Air Patrol reminds me that he might want to consider training with the Red Cross. It isn't just CPR, and swimming. He could learn disaster training that might lead to friendships AND college credit.

[HorseManiac]

You should look into 4-H! It is great! I've grown so much and become more outgoing from it. There are so many projects you can take and you are in a club with other kids. I've gone from being a really shy public speaker to it not bothering me so much anymore. I've been in it for 11 years. Shoot me a PM if you want more info.

[a4tunatemom]

Local businesses often have discount rates and special programs for homeschoolers during the school week. We go to homeschool roller skating, homeschool ice skating, homeschool gymnastics and homeschool bowling. We also did homeschool racquetball a few years ago. We did homeschool art classes as well.

Danielle

[Elinor]

Being a homeschool graduate, I used to hear this question a lot. "What about socialization?" I always thought it was funny, but I guess if you're in an area where there aren't many homeschoolers it could actually be a potential problem. I don't know if this will help, but here's kinda what my family and I did.

We went through several socialization phases, circles, if you will. We tried the homeschool group/co-op thing, but apparently we went at a bad time 'cause there were a lot of public school kids who only homeschooled because they got expelled. Several times. :ack: Yeah, not a good experience. Next we got in with some ALERT folks. Great people! They also got me started in a homeschool 4-H group, which was fun, depending on what you chose to do and how you chose to do it. I'm extremely shy, so 4-H was good for me, brought me out a little. I particularly enjoyed the forestry competitions.

Then things changed, as they have a tendency to do. We moved, and it was really too far for us to drive to that same group of friends all the time. We went through a period of seeming isolation, but then our little island was turned on its head! We met new folks, and through a series of wild events, we have joined their church, moved (again) closer to them, and we are now enjoying life, farming, homeschooling, and like-minded friends!

[cookderosa]

I have a question for those of you with some homeschool experience.

What do homeschool kids do for social activities? I'm a little stuck at helping DS with meeting more people. He recently dropped all of his old public school friends because he thinks he's maturing at a faster rate than they are. I'm so proud of DS to stay away from all the crap that his old friends are getting into, but now he's getting bored! He volunteers at the hospital, but we're looking for something else. We tried the only nearby homeschool group we could find with people near his age, but he really didn't click with the kids...

Suggestions welcome

I homeschool 4 sons, ages 7, 10, 13, 17. I started with my oldest for preschool, so this fall marks 15 years as a homeschool family for us.

I'm going to have a hard time being concise. I'll try though, I promise.

When you say social activities, I'll respect that you are thinking of something different than socialization/social skills.

For me, those are 2 different things, brought about differently. Socialization, in my opinion, is the responsibility of all parents- and where their children sit for a math class is irrelevant. MANY parents assume, wrongly, that putting their child in a building with other children somehow allows them to learn PROPER social skills magically. They do learn behavior, of course, because anywhere you spend 50% of your waking hours considerably shapes your life. Social skills are taught by adults, repetitively, consistently, and will sincerity. In a 30:1 classroom where learning academics and interacting with peers is primary, means that school is not the place to teach or learn social skills. There just isn't any one to do it, there isn't anywhere to do it, and there isn't any time to do it.

So, what you are asking about, is how to find kids to play with, right?

How my 17 year old plays-
Love Rebel's suggestion about CAP, that is an interest of my oldest son who is a junior member of EAA and working towards earning his pilot's license. He just returned from a 10 day Air Academy camp, and has made great friends. He has 2 part time jobs, one for a neighbor and 1 as a lifeguard, so he has money lol. This means, he gets to go out an "play" and does! His circle of friends is mostly other teen homeschoolers, but also peers from work. They go mini golfing, to movies, go out to eat, take turns having bon fires, come to the house and play in the slip and slide lol. They do teen things. Most of this group is also involved in a a church youth group for teens, and they do stuff through that. I know most of these kids and their parents, though he is certainly now at the age where this is less and less the case.

How my 13 year old plays-
His 2 best buds are neighborhood kids. Everyday they are outside bike ramping, riding scooters, playing basketball, etc. He is also in Boy Scouts which meets weekly plus a zillion other things through the year. Since his 2 best buds are in middle school sports, he often goes to football, soccer, basketball and baseball games. He bought a BMX membership and does that every week, plus he takes lessons from 3 different music teachers and is in their respective bands. He doesn't have any friends that are homeschooled oddly enough.

How my 10 year old plays-
His best bud was our neighbor for 8 years. They communicate mostly through the computer, but they play every weekend at alternating houses. He is not yet in any activities- though I'm encouraging him to pick something for this school year like scouts or 4-H. He is a very quite child, and doesn't seek a lot of interaction. He mostly plays with his brothers.

How my 7 year old plays-
He plays with my 10 year old and 1 neighbor boy. The neighbor boy is a disaster, so I limit their interaction quite a bit. He rides his bike and hangs out at the house, helping me and his dad do misc things. He mostly plays with his brothers.

All of our kids were in karate for a loooonnnngggg time and that was the dominant activity. 3/week for about 10 years, that was also a good way to meet friends.

Through the years, our kids have done numerous rec program sports, homeschool sport teams, homeschool co-op groups/classes, etc. There are always groups that do quiet activities through the library too like book clubs, acting club,s chess or role-play card clubs. You simply have to seek out activities.

Younger kids don't need much, older kids do. Your son needs peers, it's normal and healthy to know how to interact with peers- especially for when he enters the work force in the future. Playmates don't have to be clones of us, that keeps life interesting. *good kids/bad kids is not what I mean. We drop bad kids like a hot potato.

Lastly, if none of these options exist, you need to create it! You and your child need to form a club or two or eleven. Some kind of fun activity that allows playing and interacting with others... but think FUN instead of EDUCATIONAL. Have fun! Oh last thing, since your son is 15, he can likely get a work permit. My son's lifeguarding experience has been very very positive. He went through the training and certifications necessary, and is also a swim teacher at the community college. Almost all of his co-workers are teens, and a really nice group of kids. He guards at the community college, so not the same scene as the outdoor lifeguard scene. He works 6 hours per week during school session, 20 during summer. It's a great job for responsibility and leadership. MAybe your son would like something like that?

[LaceyLady]

Any activity that he is interested in which involves being with people would be good. For instance, my brother is in the Civil Air Patrol, and has found friends through that; and I dance and through dancing have found friends. The suggestions above are good. Whatever he is interested in; hobbies, sports, etc.

Do find activities or groups for him to be with, but don't be to focused on socialization. Sometimes we meet people when we don't expect and friendships just happen. Over time he could meet people in many social settings; neighbors, your friends, friends of friends, etc. Just enable him to spend time with poeple of many ages. Friends don't allways have to be the same age. If he, like many homeschoolers, is more mature than others his age, he might enjoy spending time with people older than him, like older kids or young adults. I, for instance, am mature for my age and most of my friends are anywhere between 2 and 10 years older than I am. I also have friends that are around my age, younger, and adults.