01-28-2011, 09:22 PM
Okay, gang, I need a pep talk.
I frequented this forum a lot when I was getting my undergrad. I got a BA in history from TESC. Now I'm working on a master's in military history, Civil War emphasis from American Public/American Military University. Out of 12 classes, I've finished three and am working on #4 and #5.
This week I just feel bleh about the whole thing. Grad school isn't quick.
Having a capricious prof isn't helping much, but if I was motivated I could work around him better. But today I suddenly starting thinking, "What IS the point?" Quite honestly, I don't know what to DO with a master's in history, I only know that I really despise the formality and intensity of conventional research. I could teach I guess, except that I can't see a college hiring me without a Ph.D. and I would never want to teach in a public school and have hang-ups about private schools too because I disagree with institutional schooling for young folks on a philosophical level, period.
I mean, the stuff I'm studying interests me but even if I could write the most brilliant paper in the world, in the long run, what difference does it make if General X could have won ABC battle if he had only used XYZ strategy?
Basically, I'm getting the degree because right now I have the time and money to pursue it. But in my gloomy chocolate-deprived state of mind, the whole thing seems like a big waste of money. I could do all this learning on my own withOUT having to sweat my brains out over Chicago-style footnoting.
The only real benefit I have right now is access to some great online libraries and the discipline of having deadlines. Those are good things but I dunno, I'm still feeling bleh.
So y'all, give me a pep talk and remind me why I'm doing this, okay?
I frequented this forum a lot when I was getting my undergrad. I got a BA in history from TESC. Now I'm working on a master's in military history, Civil War emphasis from American Public/American Military University. Out of 12 classes, I've finished three and am working on #4 and #5.
This week I just feel bleh about the whole thing. Grad school isn't quick.
Having a capricious prof isn't helping much, but if I was motivated I could work around him better. But today I suddenly starting thinking, "What IS the point?" Quite honestly, I don't know what to DO with a master's in history, I only know that I really despise the formality and intensity of conventional research. I could teach I guess, except that I can't see a college hiring me without a Ph.D. and I would never want to teach in a public school and have hang-ups about private schools too because I disagree with institutional schooling for young folks on a philosophical level, period. I mean, the stuff I'm studying interests me but even if I could write the most brilliant paper in the world, in the long run, what difference does it make if General X could have won ABC battle if he had only used XYZ strategy?
Basically, I'm getting the degree because right now I have the time and money to pursue it. But in my gloomy chocolate-deprived state of mind, the whole thing seems like a big waste of money. I could do all this learning on my own withOUT having to sweat my brains out over Chicago-style footnoting.
The only real benefit I have right now is access to some great online libraries and the discipline of having deadlines. Those are good things but I dunno, I'm still feeling bleh.So y'all, give me a pep talk and remind me why I'm doing this, okay?

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