Self paced competency based masters degrees

[FireMedic_Philosopher]

It's like walking up to a Barista and asking/ordering, I want coffee and expect an order to be completed for you.  

That's how I ask for coffee.  Granted, I do not frequent placed that employ "baristas".  

I think if I really needed a coffee and Starbucks or a similar place was the only thing available, I would like to place a very Ron Swanson-esque order:

"Please give me your largest, blackest coffee.  Please do not fill half of my cup with liquified candy or a milkshake.  I am not a child.  I will place a $20 bill on the counter.  Take your establishment's fee from this $20 and keep the remainder as a gratuity.  In exchange for my generosity, I expect you will never mention my presence in this establishment to another person.  Please do not call out my name or any other name when my coffee is ready.  Instead, direct the person with the coffee to make the call of a distressed, juvenile, male deer."  Walk off.

Freeloader... if you have never seen it before, go to YouTube and search for the "Red Green Show". I have a feeling you will appreciate it.

As to the OP, I would suggest WGU.